Louisville Barbie

It's been around for a while, but I still get a kick out of it ;) Just so you know, I grew up in Portland, Shively, and the West End. ;)

St Matthews Barbie
This princess Barbie is sold only at The Mall St Matthews. She comes with
an assortment of Prada Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a longhaired foreign dog
named Honey and a cookie cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck
and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

Lyndon Barbie
This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar Minivan
and matching gym outfit. She has no full time occupation or secondary
education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

Middletown Barbie
This is an upgrade to the St Matthews Barbie. Accessories include the SUV
with an extra large gas tank .

Portland Barbie
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,
a Chevy with dark tinted windows and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only
available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small,
untraceable bills). Unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are
talking about.

Anchorage Barbie
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2.
Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club
membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School
Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

Okolona Barbie
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too
small, a NASCAR shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a
six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5
feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her
pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Glenmary Barbie
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit
and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription
available.

Fairdale Barbie
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own
high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased
beer-gutted Ken out of Okolona Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes
low-rise acid washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see through halter-top.
Also available with a mobile home.

The Highlands Barbie
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch
less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She
prefers that you call her "Willow." She does not want or need a Ken doll,
but if you purchase two Main Street Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon,
you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

Newburg Barbie
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories
include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available,
but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Shively Barbie
Not much different from Fairdale Barbie - instead of the trailer, she
comes with bingo chips and a rosary. We don't know where Ken is 'cause he's
always hunting.

Main Street Barbie/Ken
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply
adding or subtracting the multiple "snap-on" parts.